I am currently in the process of helping several people in their mid-life (40, 48, and 55 years old) who are struggling to get below the surface in answering the Essential Questions:

Who Am I?
What Matters Most To Me?
What Am I Seeking?
What Do I Offer?
What Do I Need?
What Is My Fear?
What is My Hope?
What Is My Sadness?
What is My Joy?
What Does My Heart Desire?

Each of these people - a managing partner in a law firm, let's call her Ann; a senior HR leader in a financial services firm - let's call him Bill; and a single Mom who is in transition and really needs a job - let's call her Cathy, have something at stake - either based in passion or desperation.

Ann enjoys her work, but it is work. She has incredible academic credentials and has created an impressive career at a top law firm. So, what's at stake? Ann loves sports. No, I mean she LOVES sports, and Ann wants her career to be in the sports world. She wants play to be work, and work to be play. Her dream job is the general manager of a professional sports franchise. She already has created some identity for herself in one major sport that she has targeted asa result of her love for that game and her legal work. But, the challenge of being a very talented woman trying to break into a field that has been dominated by men is significant. For Ann, the answer to what is at stake is "unrealized dreams" - making work something she is crazy about. Some may call it a fantasy. Clearly it is based in passion.

Bill works in a major eastern city, which unfortunately is situated almost 200 miles from his home - and family. This situation is near and dear to me as one of my life regrets was commuting every week from my home in Maplewood, NJ to my job in Cambridge, Ma. - for five years! It was at a time when my four children were very young. As you can imagine it placed a huge burden on my wife, Helen. Frankly, I did not have the moral courage at the time to change these circumstances.

Bill is in a similar boat. He was willing to put up with being away from his family 4-5 days a week until recently, when he received the message from a new boss that his work and commitment were not nearly as valued by his superiors as he had assumed. For Bill, what is at stake is also driven by passion - the need to play a more integral role with his family. He is unwilling to make the "sacrifice" he had been making any longer, so Bill wants and needs to get a job where his family can be a bigger part of his life.

Cathy is a very talented financial professional - "a dog with a bone" in getting things done her friends tell me - and having a track record of achieving results. For most of Cathy's career she worked for large financial services and computer software companies. More recently, she decided to take a job with a small furniture importer.

Cathy expected this role would help broaden her business skills by allowing her to handle responsibilities that had not been part of her more narrowly defined, big company job description. The problem: she found out she works for Attila the Hun-ess. No respect for people, including customers, a lack of moral intelligence - and emotional intelligence, simply not a nice person. Many weeks Cathy has worked without getting paid, without an explanation, without an offer of help, without even an apology. Talk about desperation!

Each of these people are making commitments, although with varying degrees, to answer the Essential Questions for themselves. Each knows it will take a high level of energy, commitment, and time to drill down to "release", rather than discover these answers. They also believe that finding these answers will create greater alignment between who they are (their inside story) and what they do (their outside story). Their effort will determine if they can create sustainable change (or renewal).

But they are being pulled or pushed by a need to immediately change their jobs – a component of their outside story. And they can’t wait until they uncover all the answers to all of the BIG questions to move forward.

So, how does someone make the “right” decision for themself now, when they know some of the “big” questions still need to be answered?

I believe the answer is to move forward with what you know – now, while continuing to tithe time for reflection, journaling, and exploration to continue their longer-term personal renewal process.

This is where the Search Plan Summary (SPS) we created for TransitionWorks comes into play. There are four components to the SPS:

1. What I have learned about myself, and what I have to offer.

2. My Objective – now.

3. Target Opportunities

4. My Search Needs

In meeting with Ann today it became clear there are several things she has learned about herself - beyond her high intelligence, incredible academic credentials, and extensive experience gained through 15+ years in law.

They are:
•Ann is known for creating win/win situations – knowing that when both sides in a mediation or business deal feel they have gains and compromise that are relatively equal she has done a good job – creating satisfied customers and having adversaries who respect her.

•Ann has a reputation for getting things done – moving mountains to achieve goals. There are several contributors to her success here including personal drive, a willingness to collaborate and lead, and an extensive diverse network – in sports, media, publishing, entertainment, and investment banking to name a few.

•Ann is creative and imaginative – she is able to utilize these capabilities in developing creative, novel solutions to address the most difficult business challenges. She has many examples where she has generated solutions when all seemed lost.

•and did I say Ann LOVES sports?

Ann is still working through her objective, but I know will be directed at identifying and obtaining a general management role with a professional sports team.

So, while Ann knows she has a significant amount of work left to answer the essential questions, she is almost ready to start her networking conversations. These conversations will both move Ann in the direction of her next job opportunity, and uncover insights about who she is along the way.

I will keep you posted on Ann, Bill, and Cathy's stories over the next few weeks. In the meantime, please share your thoughts and/or questions. Do any of their situations relate to your own? Let us know. Safe travels - John